Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Psycho Mommy With Fangs

Since my last mushy post about Cole, I thought it was only fair to write a similar, loving post about Patty, because I know someday, she will be outraged that I didn’t compose one about her. Just as I was gearing up to write, we had a record-breaking Super Nanny type day with Patty that left me reeling.

She finally had pushed me to the limit and I reacted by transforming into psycho mommy with fangs. I threw her in time out and topped it off with threatening to “quit and get her a new mommy”, the ultimate stooping to a 5 year old level, I know, I know. She became even more hysterical and I hugged her and apologized for saying such nonsense. She then asked, “If we get a new mommy, you wouldn’t come to the wedding, then, would you?”

The next day I felt so lethargic from the heated interchange, it had exhausted my brain, coupled with intense PMS, led me to the only thing that would cheer me up, a Sunrise from Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf. It’s not on the menu, but they will make it for you. It is reminiscent of an Orange Julius from the mall of yesteryear. If you are unfamiliar with this decadent treat, it’s an orange juice, vanilla slushie. Kinda like a dream cycle melted. I was in such bad shape mentally, I rebelled and got a medium.

I will write nice things about Patty, when I’m in a better frame of mind to do so. In the meantime, I need to figure out how to better deal with her “spicy” personality. What I’m doing now is just not working. Any ideas besides duct taping her to the wall until she’s 18?

3 comments:

justme said...

i have made that same EXACT threat. yes i stoop veyr low and have a fit just as bad as my four year old. mother of the year.

Anonymous said...

We are all allowed to have a few Psycho Mommy moments...didn't you read that chapter in the handbook?Being a Mommy is the hardest job and the pay sucks, but it is all worth it. Love you~ Your Sister

Sus said...

I am not just laughing out loud but talking to myself - "our girls should hang out" - "how about we duct tape them together" - "where does this lady live?"

I LOVE that you told her you'd quit and get her a new mommy. Hm, just yesterday I believe I (should I put this in writing) barricaded Frannie in her room with a rocking chair in front of the door.